My ugly story..which belong to theirs

One step for betterment

My heart rains....but who knows

Whatttttttttttttttt......

I want to rant lots of thing..

off from this page please if you think you are the one I'm gonna bite

Mind of nauseated words you've never heard of before...

Best to pour everything here as if I'm not, I'll stuck forever with this such suck/infuriating/ feeling...It pealed me off~~

hush..........this isn't juicy gossips to tell the world...mind your own business anyway

patience isn't the best virtue this time

What a friendship is about? i think I almost unrecognized the significance of best/good friend. there's no more for us....maybe we better of this way...having a boyfriend quite a huge concrete wall for our togetherness. Like, you want more and more time spending with him, leaving of alone..on the beginning, I thought I'm okay with that...like, yeah, go for it...I don't mind..even though deep inside I surely upset someone had stealing the precious I love most...days past...months left..I realized she isn't into us anymore, it's all about him...somehow I am stored in the recycle bin memory..Jealousy?? Only god knows. I like the guy and I adore their love bond....but, I damned hurt....neglected and pushed away...nak ajak keluar hujung minggu pun da susah...sebab nak kena fikir pasal si dia takut nanti kot2 dia nak ajak keluar....kalau tak dulu boleh jer, gi mydin ke, giant ke same2...tapi sekarang,suma dengan dia....sapa tak kecil hati....I tak pernah cakap, hurm...sebb tak tercapai akal kot....sayang dia...tak nak dia kecil hati..rasa kekadang macam mengada jugak..tapi memang itu yang dirasa...kami dah jauh....

kekadang agak kurang berkenan dengan buah hati tu..sebab dia suka nk pegang tangan kawan I....biasa lah lelaki, their intertwined their fingers for he asking for it...she knew I didn't really much like it (da pesan dah..kalo kapel..kalo boleh tak yah la pegang tangan)...but's you know, it's quite hard to resist or say no if the one you love whisper the song of love to you....of course it's irresistible....(for some). okay, nak wat camna,biar lah camtu, dah  suka sama suka..I'm off the line. she changed quiet a lot...so do I..hurm..I hope she is more like the old days....well, maybe she might think the same about me...I think we both hurt but didn't say anything about it, let it rottens ourselves up. I lead my own path...it might be better to explore more out there... independence is my stick to help me walk....through the hardness of bitter reality. Just move in then...I guess...still, how can I hate her, love is still there although it isn't the same anymore.... 

Next, it's also about a girl...just another girl. obsession towards anything she likes. She is rather someone with obsessive compulsive disorder...towards the living. Owh my, I know that some people won't be easy with me and try as much of avoiding me for our own good...(this make me sound like devil? I dunno). Here's one uphill request for her..."let the one who you like a lot get her own space too...if she wants to be close to any friends she loves, let her be...it's pity to see her stuck almost every moment with you"...quite a control freak. Tak perlu lah nak tarik muka masam cam **nuk hanya sebab tak dapat ikut kawan yang dia raapppaaat sangat....rimas. 

hurm....more freak things I said about another, makes me even uglier....

I should stop......for now