shoes obsession

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finally...........i bought this..(n_n)

Talking about shopping….i’m not one of the shopaholic people that borned in shopping mall as the other girls would be..but, i do love shopping, to walk in a store after another… shopping is a magical therapy for girl like me and I know you’re nodding your head as you read this, feeling the same right…haha. A girl like me too, has no much fancy on dresses, bags, accessories or other stuff.howerer………I’m soo obsessed with shoes…….shoes ..shoes ….shoes….. I love them all…owh my…you have no idea how crazy I am towards those pairs.. to one extend, I’m willing to let down food to the sake of having shoes……..

Why I’m so obsessed with shoes???? Hahaha.you’ll get me as you continue this reading…..every chance I go shopping in mall, I wouldn’t foolish myself not to drag my feet into shoes department store googling around, looking for the latest design and pattern..and to try them all…blissfully……for them, I am their dearest customer….the valued buyer and the presence clients like me in shoe boutiques are their proudest achivement for the entire day..I love the smell of brand new shoes…it’s melting ya’ know… the smell of new pair of shoes is very dear….a delicate scent..just like trying new perfumes..you hardly wanna let it go, the fragrance you smell is the moment you’ll cherish forever.. that’s the essence of shoes…..you’ll let it in..isn’t it fulfilling?

When I step into the store, it gives me a really good feeling…. makes me happy and wonderful... I would walk around the department.running my fingers on the shoes..touching the texture and material used..the sleekness of shiney surface…or leatherly soft leather…then, examine the very inch part of the shoes..to look for the quality…if the inner sole is comfortable, comfy and light….the heels…is it with the right place..the right edge..sustainable height…I’ll scrutinize everything..hmm, the experiences will make you an expert after some times..
My all time favourite is surely high heels…followed by wedges, stiletto and the least…flat shoes..(owh, please). I think my mom had successfully turn me into a lady..because she’s the one who put me on high heel since I was 7..( perhaps she got worried bcoz of the 3 boys in the house)..yeah..i still remember my first heels..the one she bought for raya..the pinkish metallic pair..with a cute pink ribbon in the front, shining with golden sparks…it was about an inch height..it soo cute..only if I still had the pictures to show…

Since that, I only looking forwards shoes or sandals with heels (which is at least an inch)..I thing about heels that really win my heart is because..I found myself really confident and high spirited whenever I walk in heels..seriously..it’s a different feeling…it makes my day..speed my life.. and with that shoes only, I feel rejuvenated and fabolous.. I can just wear a paperback dress with that shoe..and still look gorgious…I tell you. Hahaha.. The most crucial factor of buying shoes for me is it must be comfy….to secure my legs so they won’t hate it.. thanksfully, I hardly experience sore legs like my friends..my legs comfortably fit into every shoes I bought..and yes, to buy shoes..i really look forward for the good quality despite the brands.. some exclusive, famous brands don’t really deliver a satisfying good quality…just like Balanciaga..i got a pair of it….if you are an alient to this brand… kate winslet got some pairs in her collection.. I didn’t bought this pair first hand..got it from jumbo sale and it’s really cheap..the early fortunate that turned into a serie of terrible event of my life..the shoes completely fabulous but it kill my feet to death!..very ichy.. ouch.

Normally, I’ll go for my favourite brand…which promise the styles and comfortablity…. But sometimes, I don’t really choosy about the brand.. I’ll take anything fabulous, stylish, comfortable and affordable. Here are some suggestion from me to buy a good pair…Hush Puppies, Polo, Crocodile, Bata (look for the stylish one), Marie Claire….or if you have thick money in the handbag..why don’t you go for Clarks.. I really put on a dream to buy a pair of Clarks…really.. If I were married to wealthy man..I’m gonna get a dozen of them..haahhaha.. here’s some pictures of those shoes I explored for this raya.in the end, I got ‘Balalaca’ from Jusco Bukit Raja. Love it!!! Cheers!!!

i want to say........

I really missed those time I had in asasi.......with you dear friends.......I miss to talk with both of you again....having typical conversation.....I miss to laugh hearing your silly cranky jokes, chewing gossips most of the time.....because you really light up my day.....as the sun shines brighter....as the bird chirrups the loveliest melody....i laugh a lot....smile a lot.....even just setting the eyes on yours....sitting by yourside...you have no idea how much i miss both of you.......and lately we rarely talk......and i hate it...i met you in the library....watching you with the other friends....i'm 'bout to make a move towards you...but pulling off as my mouth dried to say anything..sorry readers...sky is turning greyish... the wind is chill as ever......in the empty street..I hold my breath.. gulping the sadness, loneliness...i thought I'm strong, then I come to my sense that I'll collapse like the falling bridge.. if i ever try to walk away..I'm gonna crush myself....into minute pieces....if I would ever tell you this.....i would ...'I miss you'.....i'm battling with this lonesome, although I have had many of them surrounds..but the air is not the same without your presence..well, now i sound like a desperate girl...like she's dealing with greatest problem on earth...hmmm, this is the sound of my heart..i just let it audible... for this day... You might wanna listen...or if not, nevertheless, this emotion burden is lifted...and I am calmly relief.

*let stick together ek..for the next sem*

things that spoilt my ramadhan

Less than a week, we will be celebrating raya….meaning that we have gone towards the end of ramadhan….it may sounds cliché, but time passed unnoticed, with such swiftness. Reminiscing times we had in Ramadhan, what does Ramadhan gives you?? Do you think this month is just as the same as other regular months? Is it everything is more or less the same, except you restrain yourselves from food and drinks from dawn till dusk? How do you define Ramadhan personally….is it a time for you to experimenting something new on yourselves??which is something good to be exact?? I might be a bit serious discussing on this matter…because I have my personal perception, assumption and hope on what ramadhan should be….in my place…….if not all, at least some will hit the target. I’m such a big miss complainer lately….some is sounded..the rest is muted inside. I wish that this mind is not mess up with something I found annoyed..in this Ramadhan..but I gamble the wrong game.

Recently, my eyes caught on some people which of course I really know, doing something very irritated and boils my blood to the limit. If you’re doing something very wrong behind my back ….it’s okay..that’s for sure I know nothing about. But…under my nose…at my present.. before my 4 eyes…you really send yourself a death note. Don’t you ever heard a phrase said that in Ramadhan, God will please to multiply, super double rewards on good deeds and ibadah..but HE is as well has super double value on sins committed in this noble month!! Don’t you know it??? Then, I just told you. So, back to the story….i’ve found that a friend of mine copied new movies from her friend. And she watched it on her own pleasure….that night. I’m not gonna complaint her watching a movie..but the ‘species’ of movie she’s taken..it’s a ‘blue movie’!!! ‘…agak2 la bulan ramadhan….I asked her not to watch that movie in the room….playfully tell her it’s not good doing that..that’s wrong..(why so serious right??)..but two of them mocking me saying I’m just completely jealous because I can’t watch it…they laughed…giggled..horridly, as I would say…but then, I said nothing…pretending to smile..saying like ‘whatever’…up to you.. ‘HELL NO!!!!! , It gross. make me feel like throwing up… owh my god..mercy me!! This is not the worst part…we are about to reach that part…… that night I slept deeply sounded and woke up around 3-ish.. I was so surprised to see that friend of mine still awake..with lappy on bed..her eyes glued on the screen….it just unusual to see my peeps burning their night candle this late…it always only me..insomnia perhaps..hmm. well, I was doing something that should be done …as what I called, a ‘regime’. When I finished my business, she still not sleep yet..then I know she watch a movie or something..about 5am..i dozed off for another hour. Only by that morning I found out she actually watching that ‘blue movie’ last night…because she’s excitedly tell it to another friend of mine, the one that gave her the movie..haish… she said it has a great storyline…despite the obscenity..I was so pissed off…can’t utter anything but remain silent..because I’m just too disappointed…too annoyed..in month of ramadhan…I would ever encounter this bloody incident from those I’m living with..supposedly, the midnight hour is a time for you to worship god..repenting on your life..doing something good..or better..off to sleep. Can you imagine..in the same room, one is worshipping..while at the same time..another is watching ‘blue movie’…..agak2 kalau bilik tue terbakar sebab kemungkaran …org yg solat tue selamat tak??? Mane kita taw…kemungkaran dan kebaikan pada masa yang sama, di tempat yang serupa…. It might look funny..in your eyes, but please dear……if you really like to watch that kind of movie, can you just stop it for a while for the sake of respecting this glorious ramadhan??? Or if can’t , make it secretly…where’s all the neurone??? Haven’t you learnt the art of thinking?? Bear in mind...i'm not hating those people...why on earth should I do that..i'm hating tha wrong doing...I must have..Seriously….there’s more I want to talk now..but too tired to add another words..next post…I shall continue..this ranting..

There's one final thing i want to let you remember…….apabila dosa itu sering dilakukan, ia menjadi amalan yg merupakan sesuatu kebiasaan….. di mana perasaan gerun dan gentar melakukan dosa tidak lagi menjadi igauan ketakutan….. kadang kala siang bertaubat, malam bergelumang dosa dan maksiat..peringatan menjadi bahan mainan dan gurauan…agama hanya sekadar pelengkap nama yang kadang-kadang terasa malu mengaku umat Muhammad… benarlah pesanan al-quran.. ramainya umat di akhir zaman nanti, siangnya mereka adalah muslim…petangnya mereka menjadi majusi…hanya sebilangan yang benar-benar teguh keimanan…..walhal mereka jugalah yang sering dipinggirkan…Ya rabb…peliharalah diri ini……..nauzubillahi minzalik...God.........bless us..give us enlightenment in life..AMIN

dealing another day in life

Today, I dressed nicely…wearing purple-flower printed baju kurung, putting on make up.. just to make me look lively..not too much..everything just perfectly nice..i think…I’m thinking of wearing heels but because I’m going to spend such a long tiresome day in faculty …I prefer to put on my polo, beige-color shoe . looking intensely in the mirror, I think the girl in the reflection is pretty..she’s beautiful inside as well as outside. then again…although with her makeup, she still have the solemn face….gloomy eyes and pale curvy lips… she has a story to tell…to share……….again..with you.

I just bought few raya cards for friends…..not that much…I’m intended to give a pile of them to my dear friends…but unfortunately, not financially sufficient. So, only the lucky ones were selected..hehe. not saying I’m ranking my fellow friends…hmmm. Just, I'm saving my money for you next year..dear.Well, I’m intended to give a card to one of my besties..but in doubt if I should send it or not…weirdos… I wrote it…done…I’m about to send it..yes…but confused..somehow, feeling abashed..afraid of what my besties have in mind as I never presented gift or any present before….in the end…hahaaha..bad girl. But, finally I manage to hand in the card…by myself and hoping this dear friend would happy to open it. As the card exchange by hands, my friend was full of surprise wondering who’s the sender…haha..It’s me laaaaaaaa. Selamat hari raya…happy holiday. One thing I would let you know, I also gave a special-custom card to a closest, beloved, and cutest friend on earth..on the card, there’s our picture together in small tiny box..it’s so cute and I can’t wait to surprise her with this special card…hope she’ll love it as well.

It’s raya fever….still……although I’m glad being ‘raya messenger’ (our faculty provided raya delivery service..I’m one of them)..but still, it is not the cure of my sadness today……it’s hard to explain…maybe something to do with the feeling of missing someone soo much……you know, whenever I miss somebody so badly and unable to see one…the figure of my late father eventually played in this mind….hmmm, I wish he would be by my side..as he usually did…once upon a time…

is sick with sickening people

We think differently…and we live in a total opposite way. So do a relationship. As a single bachelorette, relationship is a little thing I do know about. They have many excuse not to be single; love in first sight, ready for it, just to have accompany, scandalous and to get married..which few would pick. To some, a boyfriend/girlfriend is just it..not more than that, they’ll want better partner as their spouse. The intentions are different and I glad some would seriously take a relationship seriously, to have the only one and to be the only one…and both party know what’s the point of having a love story.One thing for sure, books pouring me all the manuals on handling a relationship which I unabashedly lend them to friends with partners or newly in love..hoping they work things well and live happily..from another angle, in the way they portray their life, watching them ups and down..shifting moods from day to night…sulking each other, struggling to sustain the broken thread( for some) bonding…those lesson make my life here full with dramas..their experiences somehow is beneficial for me..which is enough for ...more than enough.. this makes me firmly believe I better stay single and not to venture in this ‘game’ which I rather called…hmm, shout me coward if you want but I just don’t mind.. as long as I’m solace and bliss….I won’t bother what people say. Hahaha…. I’ll search for a love..but the love will hunt me..in a right time..a right place..with a right person…when??? Ask God..or tell me if you have the answer.

Okay.this is just an opening.I’ll have another thing to tell and this post is dedicated to one I care so much- 1A-04-30. that's the code.She is vibrant and secretive.. like a black pearl in dark ocean..you’ll hardly get her. As you scroll down this page…you’ll learn something..at least.

From the early days you were together..i have a premonition that your love story will is another version of Cinderella. It’s not going to be smooth as flow of water…not as wonderful as rise of a sun…life is not walking on the red carpet where everybody cheers put praise on you, it’s a bed of roses..full with thorns to hurt you a lot although it smells good. Your dream is to live with him forever under the consent. You both see future, together in life. Both are happy and I’m happy for you too…but not everyone. Many go against you and your amore. What’s wrong with those people???? It’s not like you’re having affair with yakuza or bad boy or something..he’s a good one and I found them having trouble seeing you living with him because he’s good and he’s not their people..not the person that belong to their group/type..shoot! shoot!! back off people....it's not your business to put intervention in her life!! let her pick her own man... it's her choice..WHY BOTHER??? shouldn’t they be happy you have a man that lead you in righteous path..best assurance a girl hardly find in a man?? If they’re not happy..it’s their business, but the way they provoke you saying he’s a dog..he’s no good…someone never understood…to dump him..it’s way intolerable for me to accept… a way too much.. should you call them good friends??…keep your answer. I’m so fire burning inside to know how do they treat you in such horrid, nasty, bloody way. And making your life more complicated than it should be..I know you love drama…..it makes life more exciting..but too dramatic is something you don’t want right. Be strong dear, I’m always there if needed.... no matter what ......i'm not the bossy one..... stalking in every minutes of your day .... but to listen your ranting, to wipe every drops of your tears.. ..you know where to find me...

Everyday is a learning day, people have flaws..people make mistakes and keep making mistakes because cycles never end…but making the same mistakes will turn yourself into ashes because you never learn from the past. When asking spouses how they maintain their relationship-it is because they work hard for it..it never just happen simply like that..it needs effort, patience and mutual trust to cordial it all. There always conflicts in both of you either as couple or spouse... don't they see even in a marriage there's still conflicts in relationship?? there are and always there...so, why should they bother asking for clash when you're fighting...love is a battlefield and get ready with your armour..I hope you can make it through the rain…and the pain. That’s it..enough for now…till we meet again.

'you know, those who ain't understand a religion would never get what religious people think'