Two different tears

One step for betterment

for every drop of tears filled with laughter, at the end of the hour, only sorrowness and deaf loneliness filled the night.

I shall call this two different tears

in the midst of the enjoyment celebrating and rejoicing other people happiness, a grip of sorrow and grief circling the body as well as the soul.

Is it bad to envy seeing how others life were so celebrated and in a bed of roses without thorns?

the envious feeling urges me to think that way. It isn't that I'm didn't glad seeing other's blessing and blissful life, I do happy for them utmost as they have almost grip everything I might am living without. sincerely, they are lucky, the fortunate, the blissful soul.

It does feel good to see how a person is being cared and attended to. In whatever problems, dilemma or crisis or anything, there are always somebody to lean head on the shoulder and to talk with. the presence is noticeable and the words and jokes are worth to listen with. Everything goes naturally and the best part is, looking through the eyes with a serene, pleasurable kindness as if saying I'm glad you're here with us. 

It does feel good when a person appreciate and celebrate the presence with tenderness and joy, as if one is not there, birds wouldn't sing, sun loses it's brightness, leaves fallen off tree and life is nothing but empty.  

They are sure to be the fortunate to really have those in life and may their presence in life is appreciated because if they don't I would like to tell many are dying to feel the way they are living their life, and it isn't a bargain when money won't make the deal. It's something you can never buy, it's something earned from people. The audacity of hope to be as what I would want to perceive is a dream. Deal with reality so it won't be a big upsetting result.

Never celebrate 'the B day' with crowds before and it surely be something awfully awkward to have that. It's weird for me and not used to it. 

p/s: Angah, I'll try my best to collect donation for your program. Hoping friends in the faculty will there to help financially. RM50 isn't that much for the rich right??  Get well soon and I'll sweep away the worry...Good luck

Allah knows best